I think Ian and Dawn need a cheap way of getting booze as it's a relatively expensive commodity even on the continent.
How about this? Ian and Dawn first you need to find some wind fall apples/pears - should be very easy in the summer months (if not scrump some). This is all you need to do to produce the most delicious perry/cider mix.
1) put the mixture of fruit into a sock.
2) swing the sock/fruit against a wall/floor other hard surface for pulping.
3) put foot back in sock so that the skin's natural yeasts can start to mix with the fructose sugars in the fruit and commence the fermenting process
4) after an hour or two take foot out of sock.
5) the sock (now acting as a muslin) needs to be squeezed hard with the flavoursome juices that seep out collected in some sort of handy recepticle.
Leave to stand in a warm place e.g. boot of the car for about a week before drinking, yum yum.