Welcome to the Where are the Joneses? wiki site. Where are the Joneses? was a daily comedy, shot entirely for the web and created in collaboration with this community. (You can see all the films - go here).
The project is now closed for submissions.
| Ceefax Loveletters | dr dylan | (new) | 1191725220|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
A robber is caught red handed robbing some eye liner+foundation from boots.
Desperately pleading to be released from his captor,our light fingered blusher bandit spins an extranordinay tale of life...
| Cherry Equals Sylar/highlander | bhercules | (new) | 1189114441|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Maybe she could take on the characteristics of the people she bumps off.
Be it there skills or flits into their personalities or something.
Either way…
There can only be one.
| Quick Car Park Gag | bomani | (new) | 1188944465|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
LOCATION
Car Park. Dawn and Ian have just parked up.
DAWN
Is this a Pay and Display?
IAN (looks around; spots sign)
Er…yeah. I think it's a pound.
MIKE (off camera)
Looks like an ordinary car...
| Another Quickie | Maxley | (rev. 1) | 1188902773|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
UNFINISHED APOLOGY
As they drive.
DAWN
Where were you, Ian?
IAN
I was right there!
DAWN
No, your apology. In Holland. You didn’t finish it. Where were you?
IAN
Oh right. Sorry.
DAWN
Come on, put...
| You Can Choose Your Friends | Gendal | (new) | 1188659514|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
DAWN: You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family. Who would you choose to see again from who we've met?
IAN looks unsure.
IAN: Erm…
Beat.
DAWN: I suppose we don't have to choose...
| Quick Gag | Maxley | (new) | 1188488814|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
MJK
So, any regrets, Ian?
IAN
Erm, no. Some duck in Alicante. Quite apt. Quails in France. Or was that snails? A lot of chicken everywhere…
DAWN
No, any regrets, Ian. Not egrets.
| Petition To Save Camden Market | Vee | (new) | 1188485780|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
++camden market in grave danger of being demolished Sketch
General idea:
The Jones family hear the news that Camden Market will be demolished and that the stallholders have been moved out to make...
| The Call | Dave Saunders | (rev. 2) | 1188408726|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn an Ian are having a talking head moment
Location
Austria
Michael:
So Dawn what's it like being an Auntie?
Dawn:
I love it, she's great, you see she's just like me and also…
Dawns...
| What Does The Future Hold? | Maxley | (new) | 1187859137|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Another brief convo idea to plop into an ep.
DAWN
What does the future hold? After all I’ve learned, I think I could be a WAG. Being both a wife and girlfriend would mean playing off two rich,...
| Tie Up The Biggest Loose End | Maxley | (new) | 1187773860|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The Cherry plot strand from the start should surely figure in the last 30 seconds. Not only does the 11th rule of comedy state that you have to tie up every such hanging storyline but it enables...
| The End | BasketFace | (rev. 1) | 1188043772|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
I would quite like to see the series end on a bit of a cliff hanger. perhaps some sort of suggestion that ian and dawn find thier father, its hinted at and we are left with a voice of the father,...
| Brief Aside | Maxley | (rev. 2) | 1187681333|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
A small thing I'd like MJK to ask the guys:
MJK
You’ve been away for a while. What do you think is happening in Britain?
DAWN
Well I’ve seen no news but I have seen the internet, so I know...
| Unseen Sibling You Provide The Voice | Maxley | (rev. 10) | 1187960914|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
As mentioned here http://wherearethejoneses.wikidot.com/forum/t-16784/be-the-voice-of-a-sibling , we'd like Dawn and Ian to meet a sibling without the camera seeing said sibling. Then one of The...
| Perfect Day | amanda kate | (rev. 2) | 1187166971|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Could be anywhere (but hopefully not in the car as the noise of the wheels on the motorways is beginning to make me feel car sick).
Maybe Dawn & Ian are sitting on a bench or walking:
Dawn says...
| Meeting Mr William Oddie | DaleGriffiths | (rev. 2) | 1188258453|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
William Oddie
One of the siblings on the list.
They could be heading towards a Mr William Oddie and then Dawn and Ian could have the following conversation, suppose this could really be set...
| Really Fake Synopsis | Soman Balan-SommyBoy | (new) | 1186961425|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Really 'Fake' - Synopsis. It's Aug 20th 2007, Ciro Marina, Italy. Dawn and Ian have decided to adopt a 'go with the flow/go wherever their hearts tell them' approach as it can't be any more or less...
| Karaoke and contests | LenaLee | (rev. 1) | 1186898612|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
i would love to see the guys in some form of contest - perhaps to win money, or cloths or tickets or something. Karaoke springs to mind as quite funny. i had a image of dawn pulling the mic plug...
| The Syndicate | Soman Balan-SommyBoy | (new) | 1186857751|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The Syndicate - synopsis: Dawn and Ian discover through their MEP connections that a group known only as 'The Syndicate' planned to create a race of super European Community members who would then...
| Two For The Price Of One | DaleGriffiths | (new) | 1186572072|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Two for the price of one:
(For background into Eanie Mansinie and Natasha ‘Tash’ Tranton see the Cast Section).
Eanie and Tash had already become friends, they were yet to discover the genetic...
| Napoli Traffico Jamo! | harpmandoodle | (new) | 1186563766|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Having got to Naples, Dawn & Ian need to get to Museo Nazionale di Capodimonte to meet a sibling. To get there they have to negotiate the legendary Naples traffic. Not so much a car...
| Jonti's Way | Mahoney | (new) | 1186486187|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Jonti finds out that he has been nominated for the 'Young Documentary Maker Of The Year' in the Brighton & Hove gay parade for a film he made about a transsexual dog. The only problem being...
| Dawn Wants A Fish | ed_faunce | (rev. 1) | 1186454883|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
06082007 ed_faunce
Dawn wants a fish.
In Italy, Dawn and Ian visit an aquarium. Dawn feels connected to fish, who seem to swim about as part of a school, but still like individuals. She relates...
| We've Got Off Lightly | Maxley | (rev. 1) | 1186409582|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
SYNOPSIS
DAWN discovers IAN's true talent.
IAN and DAWN are walking along in one of those parks where you see people playing chess.
DAWN
No, you’re not getting it. Let’s try again. What does...
| Home Brewed Grog | DaleGriffiths | (new) | 1186402719|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
I think Ian and Dawn need a cheap way of getting booze as it's a relatively expensive commodity even on the continent.
How about this? Ian and Dawn first you need to find some wind fall...
| The Aztec Game | DaleGriffiths | (new) | 1186389973|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The Aztec Game:
Dawn and Ian are chatting about the fact that their biggest asset at the moment is the car and although they can't sell the car they may be able to sell a bit of it, a bit that they...
| Italian Job | tosca | (new) | 1186218573|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Sketch
hey, why don't the joneses reanact the italian job but instead of robbing a van they are buying an icecream and they have to use all the great lines from the movie.
Videos
Images
Stories
| Plane Trip Meeting | postmodern | (new) | 1186094207|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Sketch
Ian and Dawn ditch the car (maybe it breaks down) and head for the local airport (on route) there they meet another sibling in the departure area.safely aboard the plane they meet the pilot...
| My Dad, I Mean..... | Dave Saunders | (rev. 1) | 1186078448|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
My dad, I mean….
INT: CAR.
DAWN: Ian what were your family like, your old family?
IAN: It was just me and dad, I mean…me and Frank.
DAWN: So what was…Frank like?
IAN: Angry, always...
| Jonti's Monologue | oby52001 | (new) | 1185987134|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Jonti’s Monologue.
INT: Hotel Room.
Jonti seated at his opened laptop, he tears open an envelope, reads the contents, crumples up the letter.
JONTI (V/O) : 10 rejection letters, 6 rejection...
| It's Brought Us Closer Together | Maxley | (new) | 1185975149|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
SYNOPSIS
Dawn and Ian bond through adversity like siblings should.
DAWN and IAN are talking, perhaps in the car. Carston isn’t present.
DAWN
We make a good team, you and me. I think and I act....
| 2007 08 01 | DaleGriffiths | (new) | 1185956814|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
EuroDisney Idea:
Carston gets a tip off that Lenny ‘the kid’ Trubshaw is going to make a switch of ‘the tapes’ at Euro Disney (We obviously ‘don’t need to know’ as ,Carston might put...
| 31 Jul 2007 | Muxlow | (new) | 1185908877|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Happy now?
The crew are driving along a long stretch of road which is really busy. Ian sits in the back eating crisps. Dawn is driving while being interviewed by Jonti (in the passenger seat)...
| Mesmeric Carston | amanda kate | (rev. 1) | 1185905641|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Carston gets a phone call (presume he owns a mobile) and listens intently saying very little except 'yeah she is' and 'blonde, long'. Dawn flutters her eye lashes in repsonse and runs her fingers...
| The Musicians Of Bremen | oby52001 | (new) | 1185899876|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The Musicians of Bremen
INT: CAR
Nighttime. Dawn and Ian half asleep in car, seats angled back, bin liners as blankets.
DAWN: Ian I can’t get to sleep, I just can’t get comfortable.
IAN: I...
| Ian The Master Chef | Dave Saunders | (rev. 3) | 1185893779|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Ian and Dawn are chatting about what they're going to do after their quest is over
Location
Another Country
Activity
Planning things
Script
Jonti:
So guys once you've found all the...
| Brown Vs Cameron | oby52001 | (new) | 1185813457|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Cameron vs. Brown
INT: PARKED CAR
Surreal normality returns to the journey following the burial of their murdered brother Carston Whelks. Both Ian and Dawn have become embittered to all around...
| Ian Rants | kcunningham56 | (new) | 1185812368|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
IAN RANTS.
INT: CAR
Car parked at petrol station forecourt. Dawn re-enters car, hands Ian a bulging plastic bag.
Dawn: Don’t fill up on M&M’s o.k? We’ll be stopping for dinner soon.
Ian...
| Ian Vs Predator | Maxley | (new) | 1185789074|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Ian decides to defend the family.
Location
Middle of nowhere.
Cast
Ian, Dawn, Carston.
Carston stops in the middle of nowhere. While he and Dawn take stock, Ian, still saying ouch a lot...
| Round The Old Camp Fire | Dave Saunders | (rev. 2) | 1188512167|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn Ian and Carston are on the run they have have pulled over and made a campfire.
Location
A wood
Script
Dawn looks mesmerized by the fire, Ian is looking to the ground, Carston is...
| I Think They Should Have A Brother That Is A Twin | Dave Saunders | (rev. 7) | 1185632887|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
I think they should have a twin brother, but the second twin is not related to them. that the twins came from different eggs. But their whole life they have been told they look alike when they...
| Internet Dating Perils | anitawhite | (rev. 1) | 1186249656|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Sketch
A space for you to work through ideas and play. Upload pictures, videos, stories that make you laugh.
Videos
Images
Stories 'MSrobinson', 40, and 'justaboy', 24, have met on an internet...
| Past History | kcunningham56 | (new) | 1185555696|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Past History
Int: Car.
Car stuck in traffic due to restrictions in place for the Tour de France. The trio sit in bored silence.
Dawn: Jonti, why are there no women cyclists in the Tour de...
| Mass Tourism | oby52001 | (new) | 1185554292|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Mass Tourism
INT: Car.
DAWN: I love lazy Sundays.
IAN: Sunday? Dawn I think we should go to church.
DAWN: What?
IAN: I haven’t been to church in six weeks.
DAWN: You are joking, church? Dawn...
| A Night Under The Stars | willit | (new) | 1185553239|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Let's see how Dawn and Ian cope with a nights camping en route…
| Ian's Date | Maxley | (new) | 1185545466|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
SYNOPSIS
Ian has a date.
LOCATION
Hotel room and restaurant in Europe. Love can strike anywhere.
CAST
Ian, Dawn, Jonti, Kristen, an attractive, mid-thirties foreign lady.
A hotel room. Ian is being...
| Hard Shoulder | oby52001 | (new) | 1185469380|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
INT: Car.
Car stopped on a motorway hard shoulder. Dawn sits startled, hands trembling at the wheel. Ian outside, hunched over near the bonnet.
Dawn opens the car window.
DAWN: Is it dead?
IAN:...
| No IDea | thewai | (new) | 1185464816|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn is filling up the car at a petrol station and drives off, forgetting to pay. Ian becomes anxious and agitated but Dawn dares him to live life with a little adventure. Ten miles down the road...
| If I Told You......... | Dave Saunders | (rev. 9) | 1185643113|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Finding out about Carston Dawn and Ian sit reunite and catch up.
Location
Alicante bar
Activity
Bonding
Script
Dawn is slightly tipsy.
Dawn:
Let's do an introduction here we go, here we go...
| Babble | kcunningham56 | (new) | 1185458648|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
INT: CAR
After a frustrating day of uncovering misnomers, the trio relax in a car park.
Dawn: Look at us, nearly 50 days on the road and not one argument. We really are that close…Jonti don’t...
| More On The Number 27 | Maxley | (rev. 1) | 1185454587|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Amanda Kate's idea:
At some stage, maybe in Italy, Dawn becomes obsessed with the number '27'. She sees the number on road signs (27 kilometres to …) Unnervingly Ian suggests they fill up with...
| Rendition | Lokido | (new) | 1185447605|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Jonti, Ian and Dawn are filming in a tourist site when they are approached by a couple of heavies who bundle them into a van. Jonti drops the camera, which keeps running where it lies. The heavies...
| Flame And Co | Jay Guevara | (rev. 1) | 1185447747|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Just a quick gag. I thought I would jot it down and measure the feedback.
Ian wants the to go to see what he assumes is a saucy dance troop called 'Flame 'N' Co' at a local tapas bar.
On arrival he...
| The Breakdown And The Battleground | rehab hoc | (new) | 1185389438|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The ever suffering car seems to have given up the ghost and the problem seems to be beyond the skill of Ian and Dawn to fix. After much sitting around, Dawn attempts to start a conversation,...
| New Brother | FordPrefect | (rev. 1) | 1185386161|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian meet their new brother in Alicante who turns out to be an altogether dodgy character. From the outset it's implied that he is involved in various shady dealings but despite this he...
| The Way To? | Dave Saunders | (rev. 5) | 1185412867|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn and Ian are talking to Jonti about there next sibling Carston Welks and how excited they are about meeting him, well Dawn is.
Inspired from asking directions in...
| Quis Custodiet Ipsos Wossname | Maxley | (rev. 1) | 1185378898|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
SYNOPSIS
Taken with the idea of filming as well as getting used to being filmed, IAN buys a small DV video camera.
LOCATION
Outside.
CAST
Ian, Dawn, Jonti.
JONTI
Ian, what are you doing?
IAN...
| Radio Break | oby52001 | (new) | 1185374774|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Radio Break: What’s Happening Back Home?
Dawn and Ian sit in silence in the car.
DAWN: You thinking of home?
IAN: No
DAWN: I’m beginning to miss it…we’ve been away now for 47 days. Wonder...
| Driving Away | Dave Saunders | (new) | 1185367463|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
I've just watched "Siesta" and absolutely loved it.
I was thinking next time if they're being filmed from the outside and then they drive off this could happen.
car drives off we hear Dawn and Ian...
| Checkout | MichaelC | (new) | 1185305160|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
IAN AND DAWN ARE DOING A SPOT OF SHOPPING. THEY ARRIVE AT THE CHECKOUT. IAN IS IN FRONT WITH DAWN SLIGHTLY BEHIND. THE CHECKOUT GIRL LOOKS AT THEM, THEN AT THE SHOPPING BASKET.
CHECKOUT GIRL:
I’m...
| The Man With Everything | skorzeny | (new) | 1185295871|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Having learned that one of the siblings is very wealthy, discussion ensues as to whether a gift should be provided upon meeting him.
Dawn: We have got to get him… something… nice.
Ian: Can you...
| The Italian Cob | skorzeny | (rev. 2) | 1185287497|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn is sitting at a picnic table in a park. Ian returns with a plastic bag of food.
Jonti: What have you got there?
Ian: A few gourmet delights… smoked salmon, double gloucester with CHIVES no...
| In A Most Peculiar Manor | skorzeny | (new) | 1185280987|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian find themselves in Holbrook Manor, a sprawling wooded stretch of countryside, presided over by the manor house. Ian has learned from a passing fortune teller that one of Dawn's...
| A Cup Of Tea | zeroinfluencer | (rev. 1) | 1185125037|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn gets in a car with Ian and discovers a cup of tea perched precariously upon the dashboard. Thinking its for her she goes to drink it, only to be forcefully stopped by Ian, who declares that...
| Why Do We Fall | Dave Saunders | (rev. 3) | 1185053779|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn and Ian are sitting in the car looking sad as they've found out that Snowy has passed away.
Location
The car
Script
Jonti:
Are you two okay?
Dawn:
We're both very sad Jonti, we never...
| I Have To Be Punished | Maxley | (rev. 3) | 1185379522|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn and Ian experience their first falling out.
Location
Spain, somewhere.
Cast
Dawn, Ian, Jonti
IAN sits in the car with JONTI. DAWN is standing some way off, looking away pointedly. Her...
| The Meal | Dave Saunders | (rev. 9) | 1185115027|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn and Ian have just met a new sibling and he has taken them out for a meal
Location
A classy restuarant
Activity
Eating and chatting, but never together unless comedicaly...
| Talking TV | Dave Saunders | (rev. 7) | 1185011798|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn and Ian are sitting in the car chatting about kids TV and television in general.
Location
The car
Activity
What I just said in the synopsis
Script
Dawn:
What was your favourite...
| Dead Mums | BasketFace | (new) | 1184885897|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
We learn a bit more about the deaths of Ian and Dawn's Mums. And Ian's Dad.
Scene: near a bullring. Spain. They're near a statue or poster of bullfighting.
Ian: I don't fancy that.
Dawn: No it's...
| Reading | amanda kate | (rev. 1) | 1184866620|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Recently I went to visit my Doctor with a bad case of gut rot. When I finally got to see him he asked me 'what colour are your stools?''Red in the Kitchen and white in the bedroom.' I replied. You...
| Night Follows Dawn | amanda kate | (new) | 1184859911|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
So, Ian - trussed up in his cardboard armour and true to Dawns prediction - starts to dance about to the music in an open space at night but in his over enthusiasm crashes to the floor. Much to...
| There's No I In Failure | Maxley | (rev. 1) | 1184845884|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
DAWN and IAN use tried and tested means to forward the sib-hunt.
Location
Spain
CAST
Ian, Dawn, Jonti, Madame Overy, a fairground-type fortune teller.
DAWN
Ian? Progress...
| 2008 07 18 The Wrong Man | Anthony1 | (new) | 1184836170|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The Jones mistakingly chat to a stranger in the street in London, while being filmed live for TV & Radio news, thinking it's one their their siblings, a young tall man. A heated argument...
| Cream Crackered Sketch | harpmandoodle | (new) | 1184814332|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
This is one of Ian's many skills. It is called upon to find a sibling address/place to visit. Reading Cream Crackers. Passed on to Ian by a long line of 'cc brethren' on the island of...
| Spoof Rich & Judy Interview with New Siblings | Anthony1 | (rev. 4) | 1184769650|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
They're met at a London airport and rushed off to a TV studio for a spoof interview with a spoof like Richard & Judy style (Not real), they have a 4 or 5 surprise guests for her and partner, on...
| The Secret Diary of Ian Jones Aged 36 and a bit | Dave Saunders | (rev. 11) | 1184832877|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn is still business suited up and talking to Jonti Ian is out of the scene
Location
The Car/Office.
Dawn is peeling off the labels from the car
Jonti:
What are you doing Dawn?
Dawn is...
| The Number 27 | Maxley | (rev. 4) | 1185455020|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
At some stage, maybe in Italy, Dawn becomes obsessed with the number '27'. She sees the number on road signs (27 kilometres to …) Unnervingly Ian suggests they fill up with petrol at the stage...
| Going To Hell | AlisonW | (new) | 1184599544|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
They are in Scandinavia searching for another sibling. When they arrive at the right house they are told the sibling has "Gone to hell" - cue much anguish about death, etc. They then...
| Learning The Language | Dave Saunders | (rev. 11) | 1184949031|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Ian and Dawn are about to meet a new sibling and break the news to him
Location
Another country, in a location with lots of people around
Activity
Breaking the news to a new...
| Globe | amanda kate | (new) | 1184594686|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Why doesn't 'our Ian' buy an adaptor for his globe so he can plug it in the cigarette lighter thingy in the car and enjoy checking out the route on his fully functional globe all lit up during...
| We're Collecting Rubbish | Maxley | (new) | 1184588359|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn’s big cleanout
Location – By the purple car in a large, empty car park.
Characters
Ian, Dawn, Jonti
DAWN is emptying the car of lots of rubbish.
JONTI
Having a clear out,...
| The Swing | Dave Saunders | (rev. 8) | 1184502173|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn is sitting on a swing being interviewed by Jonti. The faint sound of children playing in the background it seems that it's just her, Jonti and Dawn thoughts.
Location
A Park
Dawn is...
| I'll Let You Into A Secret | Dave Saunders | (rev. 2) | 1184372404|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn explains what keeps her strong.
Location
Europe
Characters
Dawn, Ian, Jonti
JONTI films DAWN, who’s watching IAN several yards away. IAN’s dropped some French Fries and is trying...
| Interview 1 | zeroinfluencer | (rev. 2) | 1184409649|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
A shameless and very literal attempt to work a Channel 4 journalist and a community member into the script.
Location
In the street, or in the lobby of a building. Somewhere in...
| Corporate Dawn | Dave Saunders | (rev. 8) | 1184638474|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
This got in! Sort of - I like to think I made her dress up. The spectacles are great. Ian is adapting well to his role(s)!
Maybe they can do this:
As Ian is head of diversity, they have a...
| Car Trouble | Reginald Strawberry | (rev. 2) | 1184348847|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Scene starts with Dawn looking distraught in the front of her car:
Jonti:
What's wrong Dawn?
Dawn:
What if she's right? What if we never find out what our father looks like? Maybe all this wasn't...
| One More Thing | zeroinfluencer | (rev. 2) | 1184411423|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Who's seen The Double Life of Veronique?
That's all I'm going to say
except
Dawn will have to act the 'other one'
More here
| personality disorder | amanda kate | (new) | 1184260774|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn has managed to negotiate her way along the subway (very dark, even darker with those shades on) and has the artist pinned up against a wall demanding to see the sketch. Ian catches up and they...
| Tough On Crime | LenaLee | (rev. 1) | 1184278005|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The street. Evening. DAWN and IAN are walking along.
As they stroll, a male YOUTH runs past and grabs DAWN’s bag. But DAWN, quick as a flash, holds onto it. The YOUTH tugs and DAWN resists. They...
| The Controller And The Needer | JD-47 | (rev. 2) | 1184091730|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Scenario: Interview during a bathroom break in the car/toilet/carpark [insert country].
Dawn sits alone in the car with Jonti.
Jonti:
Now that we’ve got some spare time alone… how do you think...
| Pictures | Dave Saunders | (rev. 2) | 1184073794|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Ian and Dawn should get a picture/painting of themselves to remember their time traveling europe searching for their brothers and sisters
This script evolved into Cherry being an...
| Ian's Song For Dawn | Reginald Strawberry | (new) | 1184008167|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
She's the woman with the long blonde hair
She's the woman who often does sit on a chair
She's the woman who puts soap on her face
She's the woman who's teeth don't have a brace
Ian and Dawn off on...
| What's in the letter Ian? | Dave Saunders | (rev. 7) | 1184080790|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Ian is at a lobby, picking up some mail
location: Who know's could be anywhere.:o)
The woman in the hotel hands over an envelope to Ian. Ian opens it and takes a sneaky peak. he smiles then...
| Tour De France | Reginald Strawberry | (rev. 2) | 1184007680|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian discover that one of their brothers is a cyclist in the tour de france and go to meet him. His brother picks up an injury and Ian takes his place. Dawn and the new brother are in the...
| Monkey Spanker | Dave Saunders | (rev. 1) | 1184074307|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Ian runs out of money and makes a donation at the local sperm bank. Cue flash-forward daydream to his kids zooming around the galaxy trying to find each other whilst evading Mangalores (like Orks,...
| Tin Story | adamcrowe | (new) | 1183992013|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
An episode dedicated to the plucky adventures of the items held within Ian's tin box. Think Toy Story, but with a tin.
So, we have the 3 whistles (3 Amigo's)… and some amps (Can one be called...
| Ensconced | alexmazhari | (new) | 1183981415|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
ian finds a solitary jammie dodger inside a supermarket chicken
| The Life Of Christ In LOLCats | zeroinfluencer | (rev. 3) | 1184411074|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Ian and Dawn go on to find their next siblings who are gay identical twins and who are craft workers - working in a studio making artworks for Damien Hirst or other such Britartist. What...
| What Does Dad Look Like? | Dave Saunders | (rev. 12) | 1183818382|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian are sitting on the car Jonti is asking them about Dad (the real one)
Jonti:
Have you seen a photogragh of your real Dad Dawn?
Dawn:
Well sort of, there was a photo of him on the file....
| Is It Me You're Looking For? | Midnight | (new) | 1183630795|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn and Ian blag their way onto a local radio show to drum up publicity for their search.
Location
Small radio station studio.
Activity
DJ interviews Dawn and Ian and they launch a...
| Tramp | Silly Simlett | (new) | 1183555233|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The man and woman bump into a tramp who is an old comedian and they start to get chatting and start telling jokes he can do tricks wiht cards he can do all sorts of things. they like him so much...
| Robby | Dave Saunders | (rev. 5) | 1183855545|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian are driving to there next destination Dawn has pulled over to fix her make up in the mirror.
Ian:
Robin Williams
Dawn:
What?
Ian:
I've changed my mind, I don't want Danny Glover to...
| The Admirer | seefood | (new) | 1182871926|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn gets an Eastern Euro millionaire admirer. He drives a luxury top of the range Ford GT..they meet at the traffic lights in Brussells, he smiles on red, she smiles back. He passes her his card,...
| Wheelspin Brother | leytdg1 | (new) | 1182862769|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Sketch
The Joneses meet their brother in either Amsterdam or the Banlieu of Paris.
He is 17; they meet him on the day he passed his driving test. He is excited about a) passing his test and b) two...
| Hitcher / Wind | BasketFace | (rev. 1) | 1183798210|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
They pick up a really fat hitch hiker because Ian feels sorry for him after they get some direction from him. Wow is amazing how you can get such a large person in the car. Their fellow traveller...
| Graceland | nobjockey | (new) | 1182774207|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
A rare bird has been spotted outside Graceland and Bill Oddie has been sent to report.
Oddie is limbering up before his turn. Kate Humble is oiling his calves.
Dawn and Ian arrive as we are about...
| Cherry Dads Funeral | Dave Saunders | (new) | 1182721898|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian are sitting outside a church in Amsterdam, it looks like they are staking out the place like two American cops
Dawn:
Well here we are, at our own sisters [Does Air Quotes] Dads funeral...
| Bag Of Holding | robmyers | (new) | 1182717108|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Jonti loses a bet to Ian.
Location
A hotel room.
Activity
Jonti asks about Ian's tin. He then loses a series of bets
Script
Everyone is in a hotel room.
Dawn is in the bathroom, busy. She...
| I Have A Guitar | that_fonz | (new) | 1182695159|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
I play guitars and live in Amsterdam. If you want me to play for Dawn & Ian, get in touch if you're still around. Happy to fit in.
Here's my MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/alfredogenovesi
.. I...
| Shapes In The Clouds | robmyers | (new) | 1182605310|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn finds shapes in the clouds, Ian finds objections.
Location
In the car on a clear bit of road, probably in the countryside.
Activity
Talking, driving (carefully!).
Script
Dawn and Ian...
| Black Cat | robmyers | (new) | 1182603613|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Ian picks up a cat, Dawn doesn't like it.
Location
A street somewhere in Europe, on the way to meet a sibling.
Activity
Talking, finding a cat.
Script
Ian and Dawn are walking down a...
| Dawn On Smoking | Dave Saunders | (rev. 4) | 1183841519|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Ian and Dawn are outside a Café in [insert country]. They are talking to camera to Jonti.
Dawn:
[Coughs] We had to get out of there it was just too smoky, now I’m not a killjoy but that was just...
| Why Did You Run | Dave Saunders | (new) | 1182428268|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Ian is sitting in the car with his Bisto Tin in his lap, Dawn has gone out of the car
Jonti:
Why did you run when Dawn broke the news to you?
Ian:
Why did I run?..well it's not every day you get...
| Ian Talks To Jonty About Lord of the Rings | Dave Saunders | (rev. 1) | 1183472506|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Ian is looking at his Cd that Dawn has just bought him.
Jonty:
So do you like Lord of The Rings?
Ian:
Yes, it's a very good movie.
Jonty:
What do you like about it?
Ian:
It's a beautiful story of...
| The Music Shop | Dave Saunders | (new) | 1182416105|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian are in a music shop looking through CD.
Dawn is sifting through cd's
Dawn:
D -D -D or would it be "S"?
Ian:
Pardon?
Dawn:
Would it be "D" for Donna or "S" for Summer?
Ian looks...
| Gottle A Geer | robmyers | (new) | 1182373756|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
A supermarket (or service station) somewhere in Europe. France For Example.
Ian is trying to buy a bottle of water. He can't pronounce the phrase.
"Un boit de l'eau, sil vous plait."
The shop...
| Boarding House | nobjockey | (new) | 1182281679|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian are staying at a seaside boarding house.
They are sharing a room with twin beds. To go to the toilet you have to walk down the hall. There are no breakfast-making facilities.
Dawn has...
| Firemen | nobjockey | (new) | 1182277709|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Bill Oddie always enjoyed playing firemen games up until the point where he was made to wear the helmet.
He looked like a gnome with the yellow headgear, there was no two ways about it.
As a...
| Geoffrey Tinkermouse | fifipuss | (rev. 1) | 1185187215|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Geoffrey Tinkermouse was captured as a slave by Bill Oddie when he was making a wildlife programme in Africa for the BBC.
Geoffrey's real name is Ngugu and although he does not like to criticise...
| Aphids | nobjockey | (new) | 1182273122|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Gender
Unisex
Age range
Mixed
What does the character like to do?
Eat leaves and leave slime
What does the character dislike doing?
Work, acts of contrition, self-flagellation, being bummed
Where...
| Easy coming | col | (new) | 1182266912|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Sketch
So the Joneses bird gets busted for a murder because her DNA is very similar to that of one of her siblings. She ends up in jail with a a lesbian called 'easy comin'. Easy, part of a lesbian...
| Black Hawk Down | nobjockey | (new) | 1182265241|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Dawn and Ian are driving listening to the radio.
We hear the signature tune for Gardeners Question Time. Bill Oddie is announced as the special guest panelist.
There is some resentment from the...
| Bill Oddie Sketch | nobjockey | (new) | 1182170095|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
The duo get a tip off that Bill Oddie may be their brother.
They hunt down the wildlife presenter, who is currently filming Springwatch.
When confronted, Oddie is startled and tries to flee,...
| Peterborough | robmyers | (new) | 1182117589|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Synopsis
Dawn finds that an Eastern European relative (e.g. Polish or Estonian, ignore the iron curtain… failing that a Portuguese relative) is in fact working in Peterborough. She finds that he...
| My First Sketch | zeroinfluencer | (new) | 1182113197|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Sketch
A space for you to work through ideas and play. Upload pictures, videos, stories that make you laugh.
Videos
Images
Stories
| Sample Sketch Page | Inge | (new) | 1181902862|%e %b %Y - %H:%M|agohover |
Sketch
A space for you to work through ideas and play. Upload pictures, videos, stories that make you laugh.
Videos
Images
Stories
